you're the curses through my teeth.

i was sitting on the curb of some corner. outside of a venue of some show. at a place i didn't even know existed with a man i had just met but had hated for some time and my best friend of ten years. i was sobbing, not crying, and throwing up the beer and that piece of shit of cheap liquor i had forced my stomach to keep in place. the alcohol i had thrown up made a little river all the way down the dirty streets of kensington. i was now paying the consequences of keeping too much inside, alcohol and my feelings as well. "i'm so stupid, i'm so stupid" i kept repeating over and over, crying and covering my face with my hands simultaneously. my nose clogged and my stomach ejecting all the booze i had taken. i kept throwing my phone on the concrete while my best friend threw his to prove a point then continued to comfort me and his phone as well. "you're not stupid, you had too much to drink. it happens" he said. "i'm sorry, tell her i'm sorry" i said sorry the whole night, to everyone. "what are you sorry for? you didn't do anything." he repeated. she said the same thing but i'm stubborn and in my mind i had nearly killed someone. what was i sorry for? i don't know, but i was.