i'm crawling through landmines..

oh Samantha, again i write about you because i cannot seem to keep you out of my stupid mind. I went on your myspace after not having gone there in quite sometime and i found your twitter page. i will not try to contact you anymore since you've made it more than clear that you do not wish to talk to me and i do understand that, i don't think there's really a reason but i get it. i don't even know what to write about, i find new shit about you and i become dismantled. it's like this grey cloud comes over my shoulder and starts raining and thundering on me, like being in a cave and being eaten by whatever lurks around there. i never wanted more than to just take care of you, nothing more, all i wanna know is you're okay, and it seems like you are, so i'm happy for you. ahhhh fuck, if i felt shitty before, i feel even shittier now..