sometime, soon, be better than you were.

i haven't felt this shitty in a while. and knowing that you are not here but there and sad makes my insides want to turn inside out with every breath i give. i miss you. it's hard for me to explain this but i miss you terribly. all i've done is sleep since last night because i don't know how to breathe in san diego if you aren't here. and it's stupid, but this is how i feel. i've dedicated the last two years of my life to your existence and the thought that you might stay in seattle and i might never see you again makes me wanna die. what do i do? i'm supposed to leave, not you. i'm supposed to be sad, not you. clear your head and be happy, but come back. please. i miss you.

i miss you like crazy.